Published On: Mon, Jul 17th, 2017

Baby Loss: Why We Are Fundraising For Tommy's

The elation of finding out that you are going to be welcoming a child in to the world in just nine short months. The thrills of watching your little one grow, attend nursery, school and university, get married, and have children of their own. So many dreams are about to be fulfilled. And life looks good.

Then it happens. That ‘it’ is a miscarriage. And all those dreams? Gone.

Sara and I have experienced this heart-breaking scenario six times now since 2011; the sixth loss being cruelly confirmed by the nurse during an ultrasound exam, two weeks after we witnessed a tiny heart beating. Our situation has seen Sara admitted to hospital twice, for emergency surgery.

All losses are devastating for both parents. We have seen consultants, experts, professors. None of them can give a definite reason or cause for our losses, and we almost went crazy trying to understand why this was happening to us; had we done something? No, we hadn’t, it was – according to those with letters after their names – just one of those things.

Last year we decided to call it quits on trying for a baby; we simply cannot go through the mental turmoil any longer…and I can’t see my wife go through any more pain, physical or emotional.

This is an abridged version of the personal reasons why Sara and I fundraise for those charities who offer support, advice, comfort, and a shoulder to cry on, to those like us who have experienced baby loss; whether it is from miscarriage, stillbirth, or premature birth.

This is why this year we will be fundraising for the baby charity, Tommy’s. Tommy’s fund research in to the causes and prevention of baby loss from miscarriage, stillbirth, and premature birth.

In August, Sara and I will be climbing the UK’s highest mountain peak, Ben Nevis, on our Hike For Tommy’s fundraiser. We will be filming our exploits, which will be posted to social media.
Apart from raising funds for Tommy’s, one of our biggest hopes in doing this is to let people know that they are not alone; there are others who have endured the same thing. There are organisations that offer support. You are never alone.

It’s a strange thing, baby loss; it seems to carry a stigma whereby it has almost become a taboo subject to talk about openly. There’s a kind of awkward guilt. And that has to be rectified; there is nothing wrong in talking.

All donations towards our fundraiser are very much appreciated, and we look forward to a time when reasons can be given for the loss of a baby; because ‘just one of those things’ is never a reason.

To visit our Just Giving page, and to read some about why we are doing this – in Sara’s own words – then please click the link below:

Sara’s Just Giving Page

Thank you.

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UK Lifestyle – The Huffington Post

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Baby Loss: Why We Are Fundraising For Tommy's